I've had lots of comments from kids on my new role in the school. Some of them are under the impression that I have "traded up" to something akin to an assistant principal role. Most, however, made comments along the lines of,
"You belong upstairs!" (i.e. teaching in a regular classroom)
"Come back to us!" (Kids from my advisory last year, who weren't necessarily fans of me then, but would rather have me back than have to get to know a new teacher *perish the thought*)
"So, to hang out with you I HAVE to be in ISS?" (from one of my favorite students, who has no business in In School Suspension- ever)
For the most part, theses are all bitter sweet for me. I love the loyalty, but it wouldn't be behoove me to answer back with, "I know! I wish I were back at my old job too!" HOWEVER, one of my former advisees planted this seed yesterday:
"Ms. Manley, you should be our high school teacher next year...."
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Thursday, August 25, 2011
No Man's Land
Whenever I go through long bouts of time between entries, be it online or on paper, it is due to one of two reason. 1) Nothing exciting has happened or 2) So much has happened, that I'm not sure where to start.
This time it is both.
The last time I wrote, I alluded to having to reapply for my job. This was one of a multitude of school related projects I was working on at the end of last year. I'll spare you the nitty-gritty details; didn't get the job. I left on good terms with the folks in my building, but no amount of good will would get me psyched to take up job-hunting as a full time hobby again. I felt (feel?) like three years of my life spent thumbing through want ads and littering the Internet with my resume was enough. So, I put in enough applications to credibly tell people I was looking, but in reality just got comfortable with the idea of going back to outdoor ed and subbing. I went from 14 hour days, to coming to terms with walking away from full-teaching for yet another indefinite period of time.
One of the my applications was for the "Academic Support Specialist" at the school I'd just come from. That is the person who runs our "In School Alternative Learning Program" or, as it is more commonly referred to, in-school suspension. I applied right after it opened, but didn't hear anything all summer. That is until Thursday. Last Thursday. Six days ago. School started today.
I had mixed feelings about be welcoming back my students from last year, explaining to them what my new job is, and telling them I hope I don't see them too much this year.
I'm excited to have a job, especially since this one comes with health insurance (Imagine- me, going to the doctor like one of those "fancy people" who get yearly physicals and don't have to take a "if I ignore this, it'll probably just go away" mindset). THAT BEING SAID, I don't think I'm going to shock anyone by saying this is not my dream job. I won't teach any classes. I'll only be working with the kids who can't handle themselves in other people's rooms. On paper, it is a paraprofessional position- meaning I could have about half the educational experience I have and still be overqualified.
Being me, my mind kicks into it's standard, "What does it all mean?" mode. Most people tend to get better jobs as their career progresses. Not me. In the past 5 years I have gone from making $45,000 a year (plus benefits) and living on my own to $15 an hour and starting year two of living with my parents.
This is not where I wanted to be, but maybe that's the point.
I'm not super religious, but I do believe there is some guiding force out there nudging us in one direction or another. I have a hard time believing that all this shifting around and these unfulfilled expectations are for naught. I think there is something big for me on the horizon. Maybe not for this year or even next year, but it's coming and it looks nothing like the high school English courses I was convinced were the only thing I wanted to do when I started getting into education as an undergrad. Let's recap the resume:
So we'll see how this goes. What I can glean from it. I suppose my official "2nd First Year" is over, but I can neither say that this feels like going back to something familiar, nor does it feel like starting from scratch. I am simultaneously somewhere new and where I have always been. On the periphery of classroom teaching. Somewhere in no man's land.
This time it is both.
The last time I wrote, I alluded to having to reapply for my job. This was one of a multitude of school related projects I was working on at the end of last year. I'll spare you the nitty-gritty details; didn't get the job. I left on good terms with the folks in my building, but no amount of good will would get me psyched to take up job-hunting as a full time hobby again. I felt (feel?) like three years of my life spent thumbing through want ads and littering the Internet with my resume was enough. So, I put in enough applications to credibly tell people I was looking, but in reality just got comfortable with the idea of going back to outdoor ed and subbing. I went from 14 hour days, to coming to terms with walking away from full-teaching for yet another indefinite period of time.
One of the my applications was for the "Academic Support Specialist" at the school I'd just come from. That is the person who runs our "In School Alternative Learning Program" or, as it is more commonly referred to, in-school suspension. I applied right after it opened, but didn't hear anything all summer. That is until Thursday. Last Thursday. Six days ago. School started today.
I had mixed feelings about be welcoming back my students from last year, explaining to them what my new job is, and telling them I hope I don't see them too much this year.
I'm excited to have a job, especially since this one comes with health insurance (Imagine- me, going to the doctor like one of those "fancy people" who get yearly physicals and don't have to take a "if I ignore this, it'll probably just go away" mindset). THAT BEING SAID, I don't think I'm going to shock anyone by saying this is not my dream job. I won't teach any classes. I'll only be working with the kids who can't handle themselves in other people's rooms. On paper, it is a paraprofessional position- meaning I could have about half the educational experience I have and still be overqualified.
Being me, my mind kicks into it's standard, "What does it all mean?" mode. Most people tend to get better jobs as their career progresses. Not me. In the past 5 years I have gone from making $45,000 a year (plus benefits) and living on my own to $15 an hour and starting year two of living with my parents.
This is not where I wanted to be, but maybe that's the point.
I'm not super religious, but I do believe there is some guiding force out there nudging us in one direction or another. I have a hard time believing that all this shifting around and these unfulfilled expectations are for naught. I think there is something big for me on the horizon. Maybe not for this year or even next year, but it's coming and it looks nothing like the high school English courses I was convinced were the only thing I wanted to do when I started getting into education as an undergrad. Let's recap the resume:
- Helped create a mentoring program for high school students looking toward college
- Taught English Language Arts at the 7th, 10th and 12tbh grade levels
- Got roped into being a "Literacy coach" (a job I knew nothing about)/ teaching study skills when I myself had been a disorganized student
- Taught/ tutored students from urban, suburban & rural areas. From poverty levels to the upper 5% of the nation's income earners
- Was the assistant director at a private tutoring company- managed a staff, built a study skills program, and talked extensively with "helicopter" parents
- Substitute taught across all grade levels and subject areas- including significant exposure to Alternative and Special education
- Worked a MULTITUDE of unskilled labor/ hospitality/ retail jobs throughout along side people of diverse educational backgrounds (I was not the only one with an advanced degree stocking shelves at Michaels during the recession. I also learned that just because you didn't go to college, doesn't mean you're not smart).
- Took a job with an emphasis on literacy skills for struggling readers and work on a year-long independent study
- Interwoven through all this- Residential summer camp and outdoor education work with an emphasis on leadership and group dynamics
- And now- Academic Support Specialist running a program that emphasizes personal accountability and community service.
So we'll see how this goes. What I can glean from it. I suppose my official "2nd First Year" is over, but I can neither say that this feels like going back to something familiar, nor does it feel like starting from scratch. I am simultaneously somewhere new and where I have always been. On the periphery of classroom teaching. Somewhere in no man's land.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
This year's personal statement
Because I am not fully certified as a Reading Specialist, I have been working as a "long-term sub" this entire year. Without a contract, there is no guarantee that I'll be hired back. I reapplied for my own job last Friday. Here is the personal statement that went along with my application:
I love this school district. Before teaching full-time this year, I had been a sub on and off for the past two years. From my first visit to *middle school*, I was blown away by the affability and energy of the faculty and the enthusiasm of the students. I spent as much time as I could working in the building. I loved the positive environment. I frequently took notes on all the projects and teaching techniques I saw to use later in my own practice. Being hired as the school’s Reading Specialist last fall was genuinely a dream come true.
For the past year, I have been fully committed to this job. I have worked harder at *middle school* than in any other position I have had before. My car is consistently one of the first ones in the parking lot in the morning and one of the last ones left in the evening. My typical work day lasts between 10 and 14 hours. I like that every day is a little bit different. I spend my time planning and gathering materials for my literacy courses, assessing individual students, providing one-on-one and small group instruction for struggling readers and enrichment for those working above grade level, connecting with other staff members and parents, helping with our after school program, and researching current theories and best practices for reading instruction- among other things. Most days I am with students from 7:25am until 2:20pm, with a half hour for lunch. As a long term sub, I am neither a union member nor under contract, and therefore am not in breech by scheduling myself out of a planning period. I have taken only two sick days this entire year. I listen to podcasts from the International Reading Association in my car. I write academic papers about the reading process on the weekend. This position opened up at the point in my young adult life when I had grown sick of “exploring my options”. I was ready to sink my teeth into my career. That is exactly what I have done, and I have done it on an hourly pay rate, without any benefits, and with the knowledge that the district could hire a “full-time” teacher at any point. Imagine what I could do if anxieties about finances and job security were taken off the table.
I am currently working on a Reading Specialist certification course. Admittedly, it has been much more slow-going than I had originally anticipated. When time has been tight, and I am faced with the option of doing my own academic work or planning instruction for my students, my students’ needs have always come first. The flip side, however, has been that my students are my source of inspiration. My motivation quickly went from, “How can I get the best grade on this assignment” to “How can I find a way to help this specific student?” When studying, I can apply faces to the concepts I am learning. This year I have openly enlisted a number of students as my “guinea pigs”. I try various activities and lesson with them immediately after learning about the concepts myself. For example, one of my students struggles with word recognition. As I made my way through my course, he and I worked with both analytical and syntactical approaches to phonics, sight words, repetitive and echo readings, and a number of other strategies. We experimented until we found a balanced approach that works for him. Not only that, he has ownership of this personalized program because he was evaluating the techniques right along with me. I have had similar experiences with other students, small groups, and full classes. While I may not be fully certified yet, I would like to continue to form these types of partnerships with *MS* students.
I love this school district. Before teaching full-time this year, I had been a sub on and off for the past two years. From my first visit to *middle school*, I was blown away by the affability and energy of the faculty and the enthusiasm of the students. I spent as much time as I could working in the building. I loved the positive environment. I frequently took notes on all the projects and teaching techniques I saw to use later in my own practice. Being hired as the school’s Reading Specialist last fall was genuinely a dream come true.
For the past year, I have been fully committed to this job. I have worked harder at *middle school* than in any other position I have had before. My car is consistently one of the first ones in the parking lot in the morning and one of the last ones left in the evening. My typical work day lasts between 10 and 14 hours. I like that every day is a little bit different. I spend my time planning and gathering materials for my literacy courses, assessing individual students, providing one-on-one and small group instruction for struggling readers and enrichment for those working above grade level, connecting with other staff members and parents, helping with our after school program, and researching current theories and best practices for reading instruction- among other things. Most days I am with students from 7:25am until 2:20pm, with a half hour for lunch. As a long term sub, I am neither a union member nor under contract, and therefore am not in breech by scheduling myself out of a planning period. I have taken only two sick days this entire year. I listen to podcasts from the International Reading Association in my car. I write academic papers about the reading process on the weekend. This position opened up at the point in my young adult life when I had grown sick of “exploring my options”. I was ready to sink my teeth into my career. That is exactly what I have done, and I have done it on an hourly pay rate, without any benefits, and with the knowledge that the district could hire a “full-time” teacher at any point. Imagine what I could do if anxieties about finances and job security were taken off the table.
I am currently working on a Reading Specialist certification course. Admittedly, it has been much more slow-going than I had originally anticipated. When time has been tight, and I am faced with the option of doing my own academic work or planning instruction for my students, my students’ needs have always come first. The flip side, however, has been that my students are my source of inspiration. My motivation quickly went from, “How can I get the best grade on this assignment” to “How can I find a way to help this specific student?” When studying, I can apply faces to the concepts I am learning. This year I have openly enlisted a number of students as my “guinea pigs”. I try various activities and lesson with them immediately after learning about the concepts myself. For example, one of my students struggles with word recognition. As I made my way through my course, he and I worked with both analytical and syntactical approaches to phonics, sight words, repetitive and echo readings, and a number of other strategies. We experimented until we found a balanced approach that works for him. Not only that, he has ownership of this personalized program because he was evaluating the techniques right along with me. I have had similar experiences with other students, small groups, and full classes. While I may not be fully certified yet, I would like to continue to form these types of partnerships with *MS* students.
Friday, April 1, 2011
I'm an Idiot
Remember how in my last entry I said I was, "headed for burn out"? What I did not mention when running down my daily schedule, was that I have essentially worked myself out of any sort of planning block 4 days a week. But hey, at least I still have lunches...
Then I wrote this email to the other literacy teachers. I'm gearing up to say "so long" to my lunch period. Just once a week though...
Since yesterday's 9th grade course selection meeting, I have been visited by a number of students from my literacy class who would like to Honors English next year. Some I have no qualms about signing off on on. Others have not been producing "honors level" recently, but have sworn to me that they're going to be working "REALLLLY hard" for the rest of the year. I'd like to give them an easy "no"; only problem there is I know this kids are indeed as smart as they say they are and could probably use an extra challenge.
SO, here is the deal I've struck with my kids: In exchange for my signature, I'll be asking them to read some books outside of class then meet with me during SSR once a week to discuss/ pass in assignments that will factor into their regular literacy grade. Looking at the list of classroom sets that Megan sent out in January, The Pearl and Animal Farm would probably be good places to start.
If you'd like to throw any of your cherubs into the mix, please just send me their names. I'll check out logistics and let you know which day of the week we'll be getting together and where we'll be.
Thanks!
-Amanda
Then I wrote this email to the other literacy teachers. I'm gearing up to say "so long" to my lunch period. Just once a week though...
Since yesterday's 9th grade course selection meeting, I have been visited by a number of students from my literacy class who would like to Honors English next year. Some I have no qualms about signing off on on. Others have not been producing "honors level" recently, but have sworn to me that they're going to be working "REALLLLY hard" for the rest of the year. I'd like to give them an easy "no"; only problem there is I know this kids are indeed as smart as they say they are and could probably use an extra challenge.
SO, here is the deal I've struck with my kids: In exchange for my signature, I'll be asking them to read some books outside of class then meet with me during SSR once a week to discuss/ pass in assignments that will factor into their regular literacy grade. Looking at the list of classroom sets that Megan sent out in January, The Pearl and Animal Farm would probably be good places to start.
If you'd like to throw any of your cherubs into the mix, please just send me their names. I'll check out logistics and let you know which day of the week we'll be getting together and where we'll be.
Thanks!
-Amanda
Monday, March 21, 2011
"Living the Job"
Getting back to my 'teacher' life (as opposed to my life as a Reading Specialist grad student).
It is 3:36 in the morning. I am awake, with my lunch packed and my morning coffee in hand, ready to start my day. This is normal.
I was always that kid who couldn't be persuaded to do my homework at night. I would much rather wake up early and finish. As we have seen, I am a slacker. Unless I'm down to the wire and something is due, let's say, in 3 hours, it is hard for me to motivate myself to do it. Hence, I've been getting up well before the sun all year.
It started at 5am (a standard time from my youth) and gradually edged back to 3am. Typically, I'll take anything after midnight, meaning if I roll over at 1:30am, I've just bought myself an extra hour and half hour of work time. 4:30 is now considered "sleeping in".
This all stems from a general philosophy I stumbled upon in my 1st first year of teaching. I was 24, fresh out of grad school and thoroughly overwhelmed. I was not ready to be a teacher. I wanted to put my feet up and relax a bit. While discussing this with a friend, I mentioned that to do this whole thing right it seemed like you had to "live the job". At the time, as you may recall, I had other interests and wasn't even sure I wanted to BE a teacher. Thinking about my job and my kids every waking moment of the day was not an option.
It is, however, how I have lived my life this whole school year. I'm typically up between 3 and 4am. I'm one of the first people at school by 6am. Our regular school day runs form 7:25 and 2:30. After school there's faculty and new teacher meetings, activities, or additional help for my kids. After that I grade papers, work on lesson plans or do some of my certification work. I try to make a point of being home by 7pm. My folk's and I watch The Daily Show and Colbert Report together. This is our family bonding time (I live with my parents, which means I don't have to worry about trivial things like paying utility bills or feeding myself). Then, it's to bed between 8 and 9pm, where I set multiple alarms so I can get up and do the whole thing over again.
I know I am headed for burn out. I often get frustrated when I spend my whole day working and still don't get everything on my to-do list done. As cheesy as it sounds, I take solace in the fact that I am doing the best I can. There will be no, "if I had just cared a little more..." guilt when/ if I come up short again at the end of this second time around.
It is 3:36 in the morning. I am awake, with my lunch packed and my morning coffee in hand, ready to start my day. This is normal.
I was always that kid who couldn't be persuaded to do my homework at night. I would much rather wake up early and finish. As we have seen, I am a slacker. Unless I'm down to the wire and something is due, let's say, in 3 hours, it is hard for me to motivate myself to do it. Hence, I've been getting up well before the sun all year.
It started at 5am (a standard time from my youth) and gradually edged back to 3am. Typically, I'll take anything after midnight, meaning if I roll over at 1:30am, I've just bought myself an extra hour and half hour of work time. 4:30 is now considered "sleeping in".
This all stems from a general philosophy I stumbled upon in my 1st first year of teaching. I was 24, fresh out of grad school and thoroughly overwhelmed. I was not ready to be a teacher. I wanted to put my feet up and relax a bit. While discussing this with a friend, I mentioned that to do this whole thing right it seemed like you had to "live the job". At the time, as you may recall, I had other interests and wasn't even sure I wanted to BE a teacher. Thinking about my job and my kids every waking moment of the day was not an option.
It is, however, how I have lived my life this whole school year. I'm typically up between 3 and 4am. I'm one of the first people at school by 6am. Our regular school day runs form 7:25 and 2:30. After school there's faculty and new teacher meetings, activities, or additional help for my kids. After that I grade papers, work on lesson plans or do some of my certification work. I try to make a point of being home by 7pm. My folk's and I watch The Daily Show and Colbert Report together. This is our family bonding time (I live with my parents, which means I don't have to worry about trivial things like paying utility bills or feeding myself). Then, it's to bed between 8 and 9pm, where I set multiple alarms so I can get up and do the whole thing over again.
I know I am headed for burn out. I often get frustrated when I spend my whole day working and still don't get everything on my to-do list done. As cheesy as it sounds, I take solace in the fact that I am doing the best I can. There will be no, "if I had just cared a little more..." guilt when/ if I come up short again at the end of this second time around.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Video: Stephen Fry Kinetic Typography - Language
I do realize that this "new" trend in this limited blog is toward my academic pursuits as a Reading Specialist and less toward my actual classroom activities or teaching experiences. Sorry. I am *hoping* to amend this in the future.
That being said, I found this through a Facebook friend today. Having studied language use and grammar extensively this year, it caught my interest, as did the task of keeping up visually with the print words as they appear- a decent work out for my fluency skills.
That being said, I found this through a Facebook friend today. Having studied language use and grammar extensively this year, it caught my interest, as did the task of keeping up visually with the print words as they appear- a decent work out for my fluency skills.
Stephen Fry Kinetic Typography - Language from Matthew Rogers on Vimeo.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Sticky Note
As a follow up to last week's post, this is what happens when one tries to study while intoxicated:
I have a sticky note still stuck to my laptop that reads,
"How the 'f' did Fredrick Douglas learn to read? Project idea: Interview non-traditionally trained readers. Have them describe their learning process or how they faked reading."
I had spent hours (days? the last 7 months of my life?) reading about the complex nature of reading, the 5 key elements that make up reading (phonemic awareness, phonics, fluency, vocabulary and text comprehension- for those of you keeping score at home), and the myriad of cognitive and social issues that can keep an individual illiterate. I remembered a few key snippets from Narrative of the Life of Fredrick Douglass- specifically that he had taught himself to read by studying feed bags. I then spent the next two hours researching this story.
Did I learn? Yes.
Did I get anything done on my portfolio? No.
Even though it was off topic, I liked the research question and potential project, just not the lingering sticky note. Now that I've recorded the idea elsewhere, I feel okay throwing it away.
By the way, yes, it is almost 6:30 on a Sunday night and I do need to do some lesson planning for next week. And yes, I did just successfully put it off for a few more minutes while I needlessly updated my blog.
I have a sticky note still stuck to my laptop that reads,
"How the 'f' did Fredrick Douglas learn to read? Project idea: Interview non-traditionally trained readers. Have them describe their learning process or how they faked reading."
I had spent hours (days? the last 7 months of my life?) reading about the complex nature of reading, the 5 key elements that make up reading (phonemic awareness, phonics, fluency, vocabulary and text comprehension- for those of you keeping score at home), and the myriad of cognitive and social issues that can keep an individual illiterate. I remembered a few key snippets from Narrative of the Life of Fredrick Douglass- specifically that he had taught himself to read by studying feed bags. I then spent the next two hours researching this story.
Did I learn? Yes.
Did I get anything done on my portfolio? No.
Even though it was off topic, I liked the research question and potential project, just not the lingering sticky note. Now that I've recorded the idea elsewhere, I feel okay throwing it away.
By the way, yes, it is almost 6:30 on a Sunday night and I do need to do some lesson planning for next week. And yes, I did just successfully put it off for a few more minutes while I needlessly updated my blog.
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